


Various Headcanons

by BananaWombat



Series: Avengers Dogpile (Featuring Bucky Barnes and Peter Parker) [4]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Drabbles, Fluff, Headcanon, Superfamily, headcanons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-26
Updated: 2014-11-10
Packaged: 2018-02-10 13:20:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2026599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BananaWombat/pseuds/BananaWombat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just some headcanons and/or drabbles about our superfamily.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_**VARIOUS FAVOURITES** _

**The Avengers' favourite.........**

**Fruit juice?**

Clint - apple

Bruce - grapefruit

Peter - apple

Natasha - guava

Tony - orange

Steve - orange

Bucky - orange

Thor - ALL OF THEM MIXED IN ONE GLORIOUS COCKTAIL

**Food?**

Clint - chocolate cookies

Bruce - spaghetti carbonara

Peter - fries, with extra salt

Natasha - stewed lamb

Tony - anything he can eat one handed (so basically noodles)

Steve - banana pancakes

Bucky - he's suddenly developed a passion for moussaka and paella

Thor - Pop-Tarts (did you expect anything else?)

**Dessert?**

Clint - lemon cheesecake. Or cheesecake of any kind

Bruce - cherry pie

Peter - Oreos

Natasha - bread-and-butter pudding (much to the shock of everyone else)

Tony - chocolate mousse

Steve - chocolate-dipped strawberries (ever the romantic)

Bucky - apple pie

Thor - Pop-Tarts

**Fruit?**

Clint - tangerines

Bruce - mangoes

Peter - mangoes

Natasha - pears

Tony - plums

Steve - apples

Bucky - oranges

Thor - pineapple

**Music?**

Clint - anything by The Civil Wars, harbours a love of country music

Bruce - London Grammar are relaxing

Peter - Kaiser Chiefs, Fall Out Boy, anything really fast or really slow

Natasha - Alex Clare and Florence + the Machine

Tony - rock. What else?

Steve - anything from the forties, has taken a liking to The Script and, to everyone's amusement, Adele

Bucky - Panic! at the Disco, and shares Bruce's like of London Grammar

Thor - LOUD

**Drink?**

Clint - gin and tonic

Bruce - ice water

Peter - strawberry milkshake

Natasha - red or white wine (although she can drink them all under the table when it comes to vodka)

Tony - whiskey

Steve - Jack Daniel's

Bucky - red wine

Thor - banana smoothies

**TV shows?**

Clint - Doctor Who

Bruce - Sherlock

Peter - Orphan Black

Natasha - The Vampire Diaries (watched in private, never to be spoken about)

Tony - Sherlock

Steve - Star Trek, any series at all

Bucky - Supernatural

Thor - really likes anything with animals

_**SOME HEADCANONS** _

Clint can play piano (to which Tony said 'wtf why haven't I ever heard you play' and Clint's reply was 'you never go into the music room'.............'wait I have a music room?'), cello, and violin.

Bucky is the Avengers' secret weapon........he's a cat-whisperer.

Bruce loathes the smell of onions in any way, shape, and form.

Natasha secretly really likes the song Happy, despite pretending that she hates it.

Peter has potential as a dancer, which Natasha insists on using in rigorous training.

Thor is afraid of grapes after choking on the first one he ever tried.

Tony once played the penny prank (placing a coin near to someone all the time until they think it's following them) on Pepper for over two months. Natasha eventually told her and Tony was not seen or heard from for three days.

Both Bucky and Steve can play clarinet - badly.

Steve despises both veal and venison and refuses to eat them.

Peter is allergic to peanuts, and Natasha to shrimp.

Thor discovered that he is allergic to a certain brand of washing powder, discovered after having one of his arms look like an eggplant for two days.

Steve draws, and Bucky has begun to paint.

Natasha really loves sculpting.

Clint is a terrible artist, but appreciates art in every shape and form (no, dyeing his underwear pink and glueing "HAWKASS" across the back in sequins does not count, TONY).

Clint and Natasha, to everyone's mild surprise, are avid readers. They both went to the midnight opening to get copies of Mockingjay when it came out.

Thor really, really loves Divergent.

Bucky has a mild crush ('MAN CRUSH' he would insist hotly) on Christian Bale, although he'd never admit it.

Steve has become a Star Trek fan, and Peter sometimes makes a Vulcan hand at him across breakfast.

Peter watches Teen Wolf, Supernatural, Sherlock, Doctor Who, and Orphan Black. He flashes a middle finger at Tony every time the billionaire brings it up.

Natasha likes to troll-text.

Thor is disgusted by spinach ('WHY WOULD ANY MIDGARDIAN EAT SUCH A VILE CREATION')

Bruce can actually tolerate reality TV.

Clint is a great kisser, according to Natasha. Bucky reckons Steve is better.

Steve has a love-hate relationship with croutons and the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Bucky finds it relaxing to read colour charts and calenders.

Every single Avenger except Thor can quote Mean Girls word-for-word ('IS BUTTER A CARB' 'YES' can regularly be heard being yelled from bathroom to kitchen in the mornings. 'Oh my god Danny DeVito I love your work' is chanted in unison every time a movie with Danny DeVito in it is being watched. 'Boo you whore' can be heard muttered by Tony and Bruce whenever someone turns down their ideas).

Clint employs a steely 'I-am-not-afraid' mask whenever a clown appears.

Natasha, as well having A Very Specific Skill Set, has A Very Specific Facial Expression Set. She has (named by Tony) her Oh Thor Honey No face, her I Could Kill You In Your Sleep face, her Decapitation Is Imminent face, her Thank God It's Friday face, and her most dangerous of all - her Level Five I Will Smack A Bitch face (warning: never approach when previous mentioned face is in use).

Natasha has a death stare that Tony claims can kill rats.

Clint has a death stare almost as bad.

Clint actually had acrophobia (fear of heights) as a child, but got over it ver quickly and now gets an adrenaline rush in high places.

Steve's ass is the best (agreed on by all). Peter's comes second, announced after first seeing him in the Spidey suit. Clint's is third and Bucky's is fourth. Nobody would ever dare tell Natasha that hers is fantastic, for fear of instant and violent death.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. More Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More headcanons about our superfamily. Enough said.

Clint is the team's resident hairdresser. He happens to be really good at it and is the only person Natasha allows to cut her hair.

Bucky is seriously good at making pasta and no-one's quite sure how.

Natasha is an absolutely abysmal cook and would survive on Chinese takeout if she could.

Both Clint and Peter have a weakness for Oreos and share a secret stash hidden in a false back in one of the bathroom cupboards.

Bruce is the quickest in the bathroom in the mornings, and Tony is the longest.

Steve learned computer coding when he got fed up of hearing the nonsensical IT lingo and almost gave Tony a heart attack when he started making complex computer and data references.

Thor is actually a serial fainter and the team have a competition going of who can make him faint at the most ridiculous things (Peter is currently winning, something to do with a giant feathered headdress and a toy monkey).

Bucky has a love-hate thing for Lana Del Rey.

Tony really, really hates Russell Crowe and nobody knows why. ("Tony why - " "HUH WHAT NOTHING NONE OF YOUR BEESWAX GO AWAY")

Clint has an extremely erratic sleeping schedule. One night you'll find him sitting up marathoning Star Wars and the next he'll be sleeping so deeply he looks like a corpse.

Clint has a very mild version of pica. The team have to gently move his hand away from his mouth when he starts absent-mindedly nibbling on an arrowhead or a stray button.

Thor adores baby animals and states that his new lifelong dream is to marry Jane and set up an animal sanctuary for abandoned turtles with her.

Natasha has a phobia of headphones and really dislikes using them in any situation.

Natasha likes to hack JARVIS and play Anaconda by Nicki Minaj really loudly throughout the tower when the team have been annoying her.

Peter has been teaching Thor the lyrics to Single Ladies.

Peter's favourite book is _Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy_ and owns a t-shirt with a whale and a pot of flowers on it (a reference that neither Thor nor Steve gets and Clint totally does).

Clint, Tony, Natasha and Peter frequently quote Shakespeare in inappropriate situations.

Peter can play drums and Clint demands to know how.

Clint has the dryest (and rudest) sense of humour and is the only one capable of making Natasha really laugh properly.

Natasha's favourite TV channel to leave on loud is MTV and it pisses Tony off no end.

 

 


	3. Plus Some More Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a few more.

Natasha's favourite thing to do when everyone else is out is get JARVIS to play really loud music, sing and dance like a dork, and delete the footage later. So far her favourite is Crushcrushcrush by Paramore. (Clint knows about it and occasionally joins in)

The team have had multiple sock-and-floor skating tournaments and Clint and Natasha are total bosses at it. Peter falls over a lot, Bucky crushes stuff with his metal hand while trying to keep his balance and Tony has broken toes more than once. Bruce is the referee.

Steve, Bucky, Peter and Clint all occasionally get major cravings for ice slushies and sneak out secretly to get them. Natasha caught them once in the act and now they have to bring back a cherry cola flavour slush every time to keep her quiet.

Pepper, Thor and Steve are the only residents of the tower who are unable to hack JARVIS. Peter does it to delete emails from school, Natasha to delete her secret performances mentioned earlier, Clint to delete his financial records (he buys a lot of unnecessary junk on both the SHIELD and Stark accounts), Bucky does it to practice, Tony has automatic all access, and Bruce did it once to find out where exactly Tony hid all his money after he stole it. (A secret bank that was gathering interest so that Tony could build another Tower. The Hulk beat him up for it)

Natasha's favourite actor is Heath Ledger.

Clint and Peter both hate dubstep with a passion.

Peter eats way too much pasta and everyone else on the team agrees. Pepper has staged an intervention.

Thor's metabolism is the fastest and Natasha is the one who always ends up with the 'food baby' after a big meal.

Thor likes to sleep naked, which caused problems at first because he also has a habit of sleepwalking. Everyone's sort of gotten used to it now. (The first week he stayed, Pepper woke everyone up by screaming, Tony hit the thunder god with a baking tray, and Clint flooded the bathroom, which had to be temporarily fixed with Peter's webs)

Clint has an annoying habit of eating peanut butter straight out of the jar. With spoons. Whole jars disappear in a day which leads to Tony getting pissed and Natasha being mildly amused.

The only type of yoghurt Natasha eats is soya, and her favourite way of eating it is with almonds and raisins.

Gay Chicken is a regular staple, although Natasha is only able to play when Darcy is around. Clint is the reigning champion (a full thirty-seven seconds on Bucky and twenty-nine on Tony), followed by Peter (who is technically not allowed to play but does anyway) and then Thor (who simply doesn't get why anyone would feel uncomfortable with it).

Clint's favourite song to play on piano is Terrible Love, because certain lines remind him of Natasha.

Tony dared Clint to dress up as Legolas once for Halloween. Clint did. Tony almost had a seizure. JARVIS still has the pictures.

Tony is convinced Pepper is lying about disliking pepperoni pizza. She's not, proven when she threw the pizza box at his head when she found pepperoni stuck inside her pizza crust.

Peter can play five-finger piano and occasionally recieves lessons from Clint.

Bruce is repulsed by stringy cheese and makes gagging sounds every time it is mentioned.

Natasha had to be physically restrained after Tony once attacked her with Silly String.

Bucky's favourite ice cream flavour is honeycomb and the local ice cream parlour have taken to stocking it because of his repeated visits and charming manners.

Peter has a massive gay crush on Ian Bohen.

Peter and Natasha are the stretchiest of the Avengers, and are both able to do full splits in several different positions. Bucky and Clint can also manage the splits. Tony almost ruptured his left testicle trying it and Bruce refused to even try.

Tony has had his mouth webbed up by Peter exactly four times after multiple badgering sessions. "Did you know" "Can I see" "How did you" "Your webs are so" "Are you sure you don't want me to"

Peter and Clint can both quote A Very Potter Musical word for word. "WHAT THE HELL IS A HUFFLEPUFF" is shouted a lot in times of frustration.

The Avengers have all taken the Sorting Hat quiz. Tony is a Slytherin, Natasha is a Slytherin, Clint is a Gryffindor, Peter is a Ravenclaw, Bucky is a Gryffindor, Steve is a Gryffindor, Bruce is a Ravenclaw, and Thor is a Gryffindor.

They've also all taken the Divergent Factions quiz. Tony is Erudite, Natasha is Dauntless, Clint is Divergent (Dauntless, Erudite and Abnegation), Peter is Divergent (Dauntless, Candor and Erudite), Bucky is Dauntless, Steve is Divergent (Dauntless and Abnegation), Bruce is Erudite, and Thor is Dauntless.

Natasha has an arrow tattoo on the small of her back and Clint has a Black Widow hourglass. They use them instead of wedding rings, since they're much, much harder to lose and don't get in the way.

Clint has six piercings up his left ear.

Tony has been BASE jumping and swears he never will again.

Thor really, really likes rubber bands for reasons unknown.

If you don't spook him or pull too hard, Bucky will allow you to braid his hair.

Bucky has a nose piercing, although the Avengers only found out when Pepper was musing on her own piercing (long since healed) and playing with her old nose ring over breakfast when Bucky grabbed it and slipped it in like it was nothing.

Peter has a collection of yellow highlighters and nobody really knows what he uses them for.

Natasha loathes all types of risotto while Clint loves it.

Bruce, Peter and Tony have repeatedly been almost arrested by SHIELD for hacking in to change Director Fury's name to 'Angry Pirate'.

Clint called Fury 'Dad' after a really long team lecture. To Nick's dismay, it caught on.

Maria Hill has been called 'Auntie' more than once, and she pretends not to like it while she secretly does.

Coulson is, of course, 'Momma'.

Peter and Tony were both scared shitless by Coraline. Even Natasha admits the animators went a little too far.

Natasha keeps an electrified flyswat by her bed to hit Tony with whenever he tries to sneak up on her during the night. Tony has taken to calling her and Clint's room the 'Web'. (He keeps asking Peter when he's going to join them. Head-slapping normally follows)

 

 

 

 


	4. What, More?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even more. I must be batty.

Peter really ships Sterek from Teen Wolf and flicks Tony in the forehead every time he mentions it.

The team got the shock of their life on the morning of their first Christmas together. It started to snow and suddenly Natasha and Clint started singing a perfect rendition of 'Baby It's Cold Outside' (Clint is an excellent singer, to the shock of everyone but Natasha, while Natasha is average).

Peter likes to play Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood really, really loudly through JARVIS whenever the AI will allow it. Clint enjoys it, Bucky sings along, and Tony has been driven mad.

Tony is shockingly good at Blind Man's Buff, along with Natasha, Bucky, Clint ('HAWK EARS' 'you shouldn't have done that - ahahahah gotcha' 'dammit') and Peter. Thor is not allowed to be the Blind Man anymore after breaking the sofa.

Peter asked for Fall Out Boy tickets for Christmas. Steve was intrigued about the big deal he made out of it ('only the greatest pop punk band of aLL TIME STEVE') and tagged along to the concert. Steve is now a Fall Out Boy fan too.

Peter and Bruce both make very thinly veiled jokes about the down-and-dirty a lot. Thor has no idea what's going on while Clint thinks it's hilarious and Tony snorts into his drink.

Clint makes really good granola and the first time Peter tasted it he demanded that they stop buying cereal and eat this instead ('I know it's the only cereal I eat' 'WHAT HOW COULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME NATASHA').

Tony made Thor an extra-reinforced bed after breaking his mattress and bedframe.......several times.

Bucky's new best friend is Darcy. It all started when she complimented his eyelashes and then it ended with her doing a really complicated princess hairstyle on him.

Natasha sits in Clint's lap. Like, all the time. Bucky has claimed Steve and nobody sits on Bruce for fear of the Hulk, so Peter has taken to sitting on Thor (who has no problem with it whatsoever).

Thor is the one that eats all the pizza ('HOW MUCH PIZZA CAN YOU ACTUALLY EAT' 'I am Asgardian I can eat forever if I must' 'let's not test that theory for now').

Tony is the one that eats all the canapes.

Tony and Peter are the ones who are constantly competing at Mario Kart. Nobody wants to play Clint or Bucky because they can whoop their asses without even shouting (even just a little bit) about that damned blue shell.

Clint takes great joy in torturing the team with country music.

Thor has taken, to everyone's amusement, to pottery.

Tony has taken to calling everyone animal nicknames. Natasha is 'Mama Spider' (of course), Clint is 'Hawkass' (of course again), Peter is 'Li'l Spider', Steve is 'Labrador', Bucky is 'Vampire Bat', Bruce is 'Puffer Fish' (which Bruce actually finds amusing), and Thor is 'Bigass Sunshine Puppy'. Everyone has retaliated by calling Tony 'That Annoying Peacock'.

Natasha and Peter are the main culprits for 'compensating for something' jokes about the Tower.

Clint is a pun master. ('oh my god stop' 'what you don't think I'm _punny_ ' 'OH MY - ')

Agent Hill has gotten into the habit of carrying around a spray bottle for making Tony behave.

Tony once snuck tequila into a meeting. Natasha brought the glasses and Clint poured it under the table. Every member of the Avengers now has to be thoroughly searched for alcohol before meetings.

Clint made a pun about the debriefings once. Tony spat whiskey all over Fury, which resulted in Peter hiding in the vents for six hours.

Peter knows basic Cantonese and Mandarin and Natasha and Clint coach him sometimes. Bucky will occasionally throw words at him over breakfast and make him guess the meaning.

None of them will admit it, but they all feel like proud parents watching Peter leave for school every morning.

Bruce is the only one capable of making a lunch for Peter that won't poison him. Clint might be able to, but he never has time.

Bucky can sleep hanging upside down (hence the Vampire Bat nickname) and makes a point of doing it in doorways so Tony will stumble into him in the middle of the night (when he gets up to either A. watch Arrow reruns or B. eat leftovers or C. make an adjustment on an invention that 'absolutely, cannot wait till morning') and scare the shit out of himself.

Tony did not, to popular belief, make fun of Bucky's eyeliner ('WAR PAINT') when he first saw it, but instead insisted that Bucky show him how to do it ('it makes you look terrifying Vampire Bat not gonna lie' 'I'll take that as a compliment').

Natasha hates old Russian literature. Like, really hates it. Everyone thought she loved it but then they witnessed her throwing a copy of _War and Peace_ at the wall. Tony made an unspeakable joke and got a black eye courtesy of _Anna Karenina._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Some More!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exactly what it says on the tin, some taken from my Tumblr. This is literally like a tiny amount because I couldn't be bothered with any more.

Natasha wears Clint's shirts to bed.

Sam and Bucky can both pick up Mjolnir, and while Clint refuses to officially try, both Natasha and Tony swear they've seen him tossing it about sometimes.

Bruce and Bucky call Clint their "chess protege".

Clint and Tony both begin their calls to the Captain by chanting "STEVE. STEVE. STEVE. STEVE. STEVE." repeatedly for a full thirty seconds.

Nobody can ever find Clint when they play hide and seek because he's somewhere in the ventilation system.

Natasha says that the only guy she would think about banging other than Clint is Jensen Ackles. ("I admit he's hot" "Thank your for your input Clinton")

Tony has caught onto the trend of calling rainbow stripe candy "gay bacon". Tony should not persist in hiding packets of it under Steve and Bucky's pillows.

 


End file.
